Satire

Economic forecasts were, of course, only invented to make weather forecasters look better. And, as Churchill said, if you ask two economists you get two opinions, unless one of them was Keynes in which case you get three. With no shortage of jokes about economists and their ability to foresee the future, Callam Pickering asks why the profession does not do better – and why forecasts are still useful.

This week, American airlines demonstrate how markets respond to changing scarcity levels. Due to unrest caused by drug cartels and flooding from heavy rains in Mexico and a drought in California, the price of limes had skyrocketed. Passengers would not need to know about these background developments but they might notice that there is something else in their drinks.

As lawyers have known since Donoghue v Stevenson, producers should not add dead snails to bottles of ginger beer or they can be liable for neglecting their duty of care.

As the Huffington Post reports, an American pimp serving a 100-year jail sentence is trying to add his own extended definition to tort law by suing Nike for US$ 100 million. Why? Because Nike failed to inform him that their shoes could be used as a weapon.

A few years ago, my pet hates in the English language were narrowly defined. They were the handful of words and phrases football star David Beckham typically uttered when reporters courageously interviewed him. ‘You know’, ‘like’ and my personal favourite, ‘like, you know’ were chief among them.

As I was watching Wellington Phoenix beat Sydney FC 2-0, I wasn’t sure which was stranger: seeing legendary Italian striker Alessandro Del Piero play football in New Zealand, or supporting a team dressed in black and yellow? I grew up supporting my local team, FC Schalke 04, the legendary “Royal Blues” from the West German mining town of Gelsenkirchen. To us Schalkers, the yellow-black colours of arch-rivals Borussia Dortmund are a worse provocation than a red rag to a bull.

The decision of the Norwegian Nobel Committee to award this year’s peace prize to the European Union was criticised by the usual British eurosceptic suspects. The leader of the UK Independence Party Nigel Farage said he was “baffled” and feared the Nobel prize had been brought “into total disrepute”.

By better synchronising important sports events with the publication of relevant market data or new policy announcements, it seems many a stock market meltdown could be averted.

Milton Friedman once quipped that if you put the government in charge of the Sahara Desert, there would be a shortage of sand within five years. In the very same way, an interventionist and protectionist government can create a staple food shortage even in the most highly developed nation on the planet.